Dear John

I have been watching you for a minute (read more than a year) now and well, I am impressed. Somehow, impressed doesn’t feel like the right word. But then again, I am not sure how to describe it. See I am afraid to talk about you because a part of me thinks someone will figure it out and you will be snatched from me. Universe, protect my crush and let no other get near, thank you!

I love how you prefer to stay in the shadows. You are one of the most chilled people I know. I fear that next to you, I would be what my mother would call a Paprika. Or maybe your calm me will tame me? Probably not! #youbeyou baby!

Your mind is ATTRACTIVE! Yes, it’s the brain for me. An intelligent man is top tier and I can not stress enough how that is an absolute turn on for me. I love how we can switch from jokes to politics to biology with zero struggle. I mean honestly, who are you? Where did you come from?

You are about your business! With a balanced amount of play time of course. Your determination and drive is unmatched, and I guess the one thing I have learnt from you is to do it for nobody else but yourself first. For your fulfillment and your happiness, periodt!

You are kind hearted and you know what empathy is. You want everyone around you to win. Sometimes, I feel your internal struggle when you want to help someone but you don’t have the means. It’s in you, it’s a part of you and it’s beautiful to watch. On days when I feel like the world is turning on me, you step in to remind me that it’s just one bad day, and tomorrow will be better. You are never wrong about that. I still think you would make an awesome Papa!

It’s funny how life teaches you one lover at a time how wrong you were for looking for a television perfect love. For years it’s what I looked for, then there was a season where I concentrated so much on finding a man with the three C’s (cash, crib, car) cause church said a man must have that money otherwise he isn’t man enough. Yikes!

You have taught me that finding a life partner is what’s important. That life is better when you are with someone you can call friend, confidant, lover, biggest fan and supporter. When you can count on them when life kicks you down. When you can trust that they are for you and about. When you have someone who is ok with your weird, anxiety, and love for food. (Literally just described myself)

I laugh a lot around you because what a clown you are. But I am a clown too, so I guess clowns for life then? I mean, if you want to cause I sorta kinda totally want to.

Please write back.


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