She loved us so hard, never discriminated. She hated gossip so much, God has broken our hearts, why oh why?

He was such a good man, never did he mistreat those around him. The Lord has taken an angel from us.

The lies that have been told during funeral speeches always get me y’all. Why is it so important to lie so much about someone that everyone knew? We knew the person was a drunk, might even be the reason they are dead,then you will hear someone say ‘such a man of sober habits.’ Are you not afraid please, does your tongue have no limits? Would it be disrespectful to just say the truth because frankly who is at the funeral that needs to be lied to the way we do.  need some balancing on this one. The gossip becomes one who hated and never condoned it. The biggest liar becomes the  honest person. The abusive person becomes the loving person. Because they are dead? Or do we just speak in opposite? I finally get it!

Listen, whenever it is that I die please feel free to call me out on all my bull, just stand there and say it all. Matter of fact let me draft this for y’all, you might as well copy and paste it on my tombstone even.

Natasha, she didn’t really like her first name. She felt like it was attached to a lot of hurtful and painful memories so she somewhat stopped using it. She preferred Nobuhle, that is were she got her stage name, uBu. Oh she hated how people never typed her stage name right, she ignored a few people for that reason alone. She felt like it was disrespectful to put zero effort into typing it right. She gossiped, oh yes she did, for every time she did she prayed for forgiveness then went right back into it. Her heart was always in the right place but she was human, made her own mistakes and when she could she owned up to them, embraced  them and then let go. She hurt so many people, knowingly and unknowingly and if there is anyone who never got an apology from her,I know she is sorry. Please accept her apology.

Her short temper always got the best of her, as she grew up she learnt to control it. And maybe in trying to control it she just became a person who when wronged would walk away, but I tell you this, she wouldn’t have forgotten what you did to her. It would take stepping on her toe and the chronicles would open up. Oh you would get it! Did I mention she was bad with confrontation, sometimes she would pray for the person and the situation and at times she would just curse you as she walked away.

She was a broken and angered soul that tried to work through it all. I pray that she had released some of you here who had hurt her and never saw the need to apologize. I pray that she forgave you for the hurt you caused her too. She was quick to shut one out and stop loving them because she had been hurt way too many times. I stand here and I speak negatively as some of you would say but that is because many saw the good side. She was not pretending, that is who she was but she was also this. She wanted people to remember all of her, good and bad! Thank you. 

Do not let me catch you lie on me, I will slap you silly. I wonder if that is possible when you are dead, topic for another day maybe? I hope someone actually digs this up and uses it, let fakeness not be a part of my death. There is nothing we can do about the fake crying, actually can we talk about those that try throw themselves in the grave.  I kid you not for every time I have seen that it, it is the person who cared the least about the deceased, my tears dry up and all I want to do is laugh. My sister just laughs to be honest. What are you doing? So dramatic, I can’t with human beings.  Oh then there are those that start wailing 3 blocks away from the gathering home, no tears by the way just noise njee, that one I have not understood. Are you inviting the neighborhood? What is it? I love my people though.

This has gone on for years and years. People who abandoned their families are given credit that is not theirs. It is as though death qualifies one for a new character, human given. I find it to be a tad bit crazy but it is what it is. One day I will do a blog post on the weirdly funny things that took place at funerals I have been to. Thank you for reading.Ciao!