How To Stop Comparing Yourself To Other People

How To Stop Comparing Yourself To Other People

2018: I felt like nothing I did mattered, like any effort I put into my work was useless because nothing worked anyway. I started doubting the talent that I was born with. I saw other people do what I did and I would have a lump of jealousy stuck on my throat for days. I wondered how it was that other people were making it, I thought of all the possible reasons why they had it going on and I did not. I started seeing things, feeling like I...

The Real Reason You Are Afraid Of Celebrating Your Wins

The Real Reason You Are Afraid Of Celebrating Your Wins

I am starting to think I was out to sub myself with most of these topics because, wow! If there is one person who is still learning to celebrate wins, it is this little girl over here. There are times when I start to see my wins as wins after a very long time. Ever had those times when you sit and think, ‘damn girl, you did that, you had it in the bag.’ Cause I have a lot of those. I realize where my fear to celebrate myself comes from, it...

How To Give Constructive Criticism

How To Give Constructive Criticism

I hate, wait. I ABSOLUTELY hate being corrected during the people. This is something the people who raised me, the people who taught me, and those that were around me never picked up. I feel attacked and I crumble. Even if your words are real and true that is not what I hear, the embarrassment that I feel does not allow me to accept your words. I start to resent you as a person. Hey, you just learnt something about me! There are many of us who...

Why You Need To Stop Playing The Blame Game & Deal With Your Insecurities

Why You Need To Stop Playing The Blame Game & Deal With Your Insecurities

We battle with insecurity every other day, I have days when there is a job opening that a friend sends to me and I question why they would think I fit the description. Sometimes I find myself getting angry, it almost feels like an insult. You and I both know that is just my insecurity coming out to play, it is my doubt turning against me. I remind myself that nobody would send me a job opportunity if they thought that I could not do it, nobody...

6 Types Of Toxic People

6 Types Of Toxic People

If there is one thing I have spoken about over and over again is toxic people and how one should leave before it is too late. I still stand by it because there is nobody who should come before you, you need to understand that. Here is something I realize I have not spoken about, types of toxic people. Without wasting much of your time, let us get into it! The Narcissist - a few days back we were talking about the narcissist. In that blog post,...

How To Let Go Of Your Past And Love Yourself

How To Let Go Of Your Past And Love Yourself

A horror story for many. If you are reading this right now and your past is the reason you are closed off and isolated I want you to know that you are not alone. I have been there too. I was hurt and my anger did not allow me to do as much as give myself a chance. I stopped seeing my potential and my strengths, I allowed past events to swallow them completely. When people complimented me, I developed hate for them because to me they were liars....

Why It Is Ok To Respect Other People’s Opinions

Why It Is Ok To Respect Other People’s Opinions

Oh if only we could ladies and gentlemen, if only we could. Twitter reminds me every day that this is the hardest thing you could ever ask of human beings, respecting the next person’s opinion. We tweet our opinions, we disagree then next thing you know we are in a twar that leads to insults that have nothing to do with the opinion that was tweeted in the first place. So bizarre! But here we are. There is so much aggression put into this and it...

How To Manage Your Time

How To Manage Your Time

Ever had a day planned out in your head perfectly, you tell yourself that you got things covered. The day itself then starts feeling like chaos 2 hours in, by the time midday hits you just want to give up cause nothing seems to be working out. End day when you finally sit down, it hits you that you forgot something more important than picking up your laundry from the laundromat. If you still have these days going then here is what you need to...

Why You Need To Choose Yourself & Not The Sex

Why You Need To Choose Yourself & Not The Sex

Sex is the number source of confusion in a toxic relationship. No, I lie, GOOD SEX is the number one source of confusion toxic relationship. It can easily make one believe that they are in love and everything is going to be ok when in fact they were just horny and the pipe was laid right or she just rode you like a rodeo. Is that the statement? WHY YOU STAY Okafor’s Law: this law states that when the sex is good the first time it makes it very...

Who Is Feminism For

Who Is Feminism For

feminismLearn to pronounce/ˈfɛmɪnɪz(ə)m/ nounthe advocacy of women's rights on the ground of the equality of the sexes. the advocacy of women's rights on the ground of the equality of the sexes. patriarchyLearn to pronounce/ˈpeɪtrɪɑːki/ nouna system of society or government in which the father or eldest male is head of the family and descent is reckoned through the male line.the thematic relationships of the ballad are worked out according to...

How To Live For Yourself

How To Live For Yourself

Is it even possible in this digital world? I bumped into a tweet just yesterday and it read, ‘social media is fake I wish y’all knew.’ Of course, I paraphrased that but it made me stop and think for a minute. We see it, so it exists but the story behind it is what we do not have. Is that where the fakeness comes in? that someone will sell hard work when they stole from someone else to have what they have, not to say stealing is an easy task but...

Is Faking It Till You Make It Realistic?

Is Faking It Till You Make It Realistic?

This was a very tricky topic to tackle because I mean we have normalized the saying, ‘fake it till you make it.’ I listened in on a radio show a few months back, it was Tech Thursdays on Heart and Soul radio (catch them every Thursday between 3-4 pm), they had a guest that day. So they got round to talking about getting attention from big clients and the guest said something interesting.  He said, ‘For those people to take you seriously...

Why It Is Important To Communicate Effectively

Why It Is Important To Communicate Effectively

I am very passionate about communication, I have lost relationships with many people from lovers, friends to the family because of poor communication. I wish I could drill the importance of effective communication into people because WOW! For those who did not read my book THE KINGS THAT DIDN’T NEEDS THIS QUEEN, I wrote about one relationship I was in where the communication was horrible. Listen, this man would just ignore my messages and if I...

5 Ways To Show Gratitude

5 Ways To Show Gratitude

Gratitude: noun the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. "she expressed her gratitude to the committee for their support" Sounds so simple right? It seems like something that should just live in us, something we should not have to talk about at all. Well, here we are because for some reason we are all not wired the same. I have come across so many people who do not see the need to show gratitude,...

Why You Need To Learn To Apologize

Why You Need To Learn To Apologize

STORYTIME! So last year someone crossed a boundary, crossed it all the way to the finish line guys. I remember listening to what the person had done and my heart sank. I could not believe that a person I called a friend, one that I respected would go out and do something like that. So I decided to ask them about it because, errrrmmmm no way we are pretending this did not happen. So I asked and right there and then this person drove into victim...

4 Tips To Improve Your Listening Skills

4 Tips To Improve Your Listening Skills

Nothing is more frustrating than talking to someone who doesn’t know how to listen. There are people out there who are always ready to defend themselves so they have no time to hear the other person out. They tend to feel like they are being attacked all the time, as they are reading this in their mind they are defending themselves. I just hope they are not doing it out loud because…. Ok listen, I have a point and you know it. There could be...

4 Reasons You Should Be Selfish & Treat Yourself

4 Reasons You Should Be Selfish & Treat Yourself

DISCLAIMER: THIS DOES NOT MEAN DITCH YOUR BILLS AND WILD OUT. Now that is out there, I have one question, are you in your own budget? Do you count yourself and the things you love? Or are you stuck in the idealogy that spending money on yourself is wasting money? Many people don’t seem to believe that you can save and still spoil yourself, for whatever reason these two cannot co-exist. Madness huh? Why are we working so hard if we cannot do the...

How I Ran Businesses Into The Ground

How I Ran Businesses Into The Ground

Listen I have started so many businesses and they have failed! I can blame the economy and the government, I really can, but the truth is I was the problem. When I thought of an idea, my imagination played tricks on me so hard because it took me as far as seeing...

How I am Managing My Money In 2021

How I am Managing My Money In 2021

I remember when I was younger and all I ever wished for was to grow up and make my own money. I dreamt of buying a car and a house, I would have all the food I liked and ate it the way I wished because damn it, it is my food! Then adulthood came and shook me to my...

Why You Need To Network & Create Relationships

Why You Need To Network & Create Relationships

‘I got this, I do not need anyone else to help.’ Well, do you really got it though? I see many people with this attitude and I do not judge them because once upon a time I was them. That stemmed mostly from childhood trauma, I always felt like when I asked for...

The Importance Of Continuous Learning

The Importance Of Continuous Learning

Let me start by asking you, 'what do you do and how often do things evolve in your industry?' (Comment below!) In my industry, it feels like things daily. I mean I have to deal with Facebook and Instagram so you can imagine what that is like, those two platforms drain...

Loving Yourself Enough To Find True Love

Loving Yourself Enough To Find True Love

Here is something many of you may not know about me, I am easily attracted to broken souls. I often tell myself that I can help them patch up the broken pieces and be whole all over again. I have had friends and boyfriends that were broken and by the time I left those...

How I Found My Happiness And Owned My Mistakes

How I Found My Happiness And Owned My Mistakes

Happiness, it feels like a myth considering the times that we are in right. We have been tried and tested by this virus for over 300 days now and I have to say, this is not the life I envisioned. It feels so closed up and suffocating, we have always been uncertain...

10 Ways To Live A Better Life

10 Ways To Live A Better Life

Our lives are very busy, we are always doing this or that. Even in this very lockdown we find ourselves overwhelmed whilst confined in our own homes, who thought? None of us where ever prepared for what 2020 brought. Our homes have become our working spaces, for some...